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need some major advice [9. 3. 2015, 12:35am]

snakewoman
[ mood | exhausted ]

I need some major help not for me but for my wife, about a month ago she went to check on her dad because he lived with us well when she went in there she had found him dead he had passed away in his sleep well she had took it hard which it is normal but then she was doing good and about a week ago things had started to change she don't want to do anything around the house such as clean,and it is like pulling teeth to get her to leave the house, and her mood has changed for the worse all she wants to do is try to fight with me. Or start to act like the way her dad did (he always was mean to both of us) I have been getting more hours at work to help us survive now that it is the only income we have now. I come home and have to clean the house and take care of everything it is almost like she is going into s deep depression and she tels me she don't need help. So can anyone please help on some advice on this I am getting the feeling all she wants to do is try to push me and everyone away.

Becky

Heal me

cant take no more [8. 11. 2015, 2:35pm]

snakewoman
Well things have been very bad for me this past week anevd now this week, first my wife dad had passed away a week ago Sunday so I have had to stay strong for her and as well as working my ass off to help to pay the bills and then yesterday I got home from work to find my chihuahua had passed away he was 13 years old which it has pushed me over the edge I can't take no more and I have no one to talk to around here.all I want to do is lock myself in a room and never come out. I feel numb

Becky
Heal me

today [3. 16. 2011, 12:50am]

snakewoman
[ mood | apathetic ]

Well I realy need to find a way to control my anger every time I get mad I hall off and. Hit the wall which it has been a few months since I hit the wall well then tonight I got into a argument with my wife and. Without thinking I went and. Punched the wall I really need to find a way to help control my anger because before I know I am going to hurt my hand really bad is there any. One in here who could help with any suggestion on how to control my anger

Heal me

Dermatillomania Documentary! (and I need your help) [2. 4. 2011, 9:04am]

flamegirl_kitty
[ mood | accomplished ]

After working on my dermatillomania (compulsive skin picking) documentary for over a year and a half, the trailer is out! Please share this in other online communities you are involved in, and to anyone. I want this video to go viral for the people who need to see it. Thank you!



My facebook page is: http://www.facebook.com/pages/FOREVER-MARKED-A-Dermatillomania-Diary-by-Nova-Scotian-author-A-Hartlin/177738602694

Heal me

Still recruiting participants for study on self-harm [12. 1. 2010, 2:27pm]
perl_sfu
Hi there,

I know some members from this group have participated in our research, so I wanted to send along a quick update and to let you know that we are still recruiting participants for our research on self-harm.  The Characteristics Associated with Self-Injury Study began in March 2009. Since we began, over 350 people from 18 different countries have participated in this study. 83 people are currently participating in the longitudinal portion of the study, completing questionnaires every three months. This part will help us understand patterns of self-injury over time, as well as what motivates people to recover or stop from self-injuring. 

Below is some more information about the study. Please email us at perl@sfu.ca if you have any questions or if you are interested in participating!

Best wishes!
The Personality and Emotion Research Lab




****************************************
********************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************



Hello again from the Personality and Emotion Research Laboratory (PERL)!

Would you like to help us understand how to help people who self-harm? We are currently recruiting participants for the second phase of our research on self-harm, and we want your help! Participating in the study takes 2 hours, and you will receive an online gift certificate worth $10 CAD for each time point you complete, plus a chance for a $25 bonus if you complete all the follow-ups for a total of $75.

If you are interested in participating, please email us at perl@sfu.ca. All your information will be kept confidential, and no identifying information is linked to your responses.


****************************************
**********************
THE DETAILS:

Background Information:

Self-injury (sometimes called “self-harm”) involves harming yourself on purpose. Some examples include cutting or burning yourself, taking an overdose of pills, or banging your head. Right now, very little is known about why people start or stop self-harming. The Personality and Emotion Research Lab (PERL), a research team from Simon Fraser University in Canada, is conducting a study to learn more about the experiences of people who self-harm, and we want your help! We are interested in how emotions, life experiences, stress and coping styles affect self-harm. We hope that this research will help other people understand more about why people self-harm and what they can do to help.

What you can do:

If you want to participate in this study, you will fill out online questionnaires on self-harm, emotions, coping, symptoms, and life events. These questionnaires will take approximately 2 hour to complete. Later, you’ll have a chance to complete follow-up questionnaires over a 12 month period. Although the first session is long, the follow-up questionnaires are shorter, and usually take on 30 to 90 minutes to complete.

Who can participate:

We are looking for people who currently self-harm (whether you are trying to stop or not), AND those who have self-harmed in the past and quit.You must be at least 16 years old to participate.

What’s in it for you:

Participants who complete the questionnaires will receive a $10 (Canadian currency) gift certificate each time you complete the questionnaires (from amazon.com or PayPal). In addition, you will receive a $25 bonus if you complete all five follow-ups in the first year! Telling us about your experiences will give us important information on how self-harm changes over time, and could help develop and improve treatments for people who want to stop self-harming.

Important Information:

This study is the second phase of this line of research, and builds on the previous study. If you have already participated in our research (in a study called “Characteristics Associated with Self-Injury”), you are still eligible to complete this study.

Please contact us at perl@sfu.ca if you are interested in participating or if you have any questions.

Thank you,

Personality and Emotion Research Laboratory (PERL)
Simon Fraser University
Department of Psychology
RCB5246, 8888 University Drive
Burnaby, BC, Canada V5A 1S6
Heal me

Please Help Us Understand Self-harm [10. 24. 2010, 10:30pm]
perl_sfu
 Hello again from the Personality and Emotion Research Laboratory (PERL)!

Would you like to help us understand how to help people who self-harm? We are currently recruiting participants for the second phase of our research on self-harm, and we want your help! We are looking for people who have self-injured, whether you are currently trying to stop or not, to complete questionnaires every 3 months for one year to understand patterns of self-harm over time. Participating in the study takes 2 hours, and you will receive an online gift certificate worth $5 CAD for each time point you complete, plus a chance for a $25 bonus if you complete all the follow-ups over one year for a total of $50.

If you are interested in participating, please email us at emotion@sfu.ca. All your information will be kept confidential, and no identifying information is linked to your responses.


**************************************************************
THE DETAILS:

Background Information:

Self-injury (sometimes called “self-harm”) involves harming yourself on purpose. Some examples include cutting or burning yourself, taking an overdose of pills, or banging your head. Right now, very little is known about why people start or stop self-harming. The Personality and Emotion Research Lab (PERL), a research team from Simon Fraser University in Canada, is conducting a study to learn more about the experiences of people who self-harm, and we want your help! We are interested in how emotions, life experiences, stress and coping styles affect self-harm. We hope that this research will help other people understand more about why people self-harm and what they can do to help.

What you can do:

If you want to participate in this study, you will fill out online questionnaires on self-harm, emotions, coping, symptoms, and life events. These questionnaires will take approximately 2 hour to complete. Later, you’ll have a chance to complete follow-up questionnaires over a 12 month period. Although the first session is long, the follow-up questionnaires are shorter, and usually take on 30 to 90 minutes to complete.

Who can participate:

We are looking for people who currently self-harm (whether you are trying to stop or not), AND those who have self-harmed in the past and quit.You must be at least 16 years old to participate.

What’s in it for you:

Participants who complete the questionnaires will receive a $5 (Canadian currency) gift certificate each time you complete the questionnaires (from amazon.com or PayPal). In addition, you will receive a $25 bonus if you complete all five follow-ups in the first year! Telling us about your experiences will give us important information on how self-harm changes over time, and could help develop and improve treatments for people who want to stop self-harming.

Important Information:

This study is the second phase of this line of research, and builds on the previous study. If you have already participated in our research (in a study called “Characteristics Associated with Self-Injury”), you are still eligible to complete this study.

Please contact us at emotion@sfu.ca if you are interested in participating or if you have any questions.

Thank you,

Personality and Emotion Research Laboratory (PERL)
Simon Fraser University
Department of Psychology
RCB5246, 8888 University Drive
Burnaby, BC, Canada V5A 1S6
Heal me

Introduction [10. 14. 2010, 7:29pm]

manic_insomnia
Just wanted to introduce myself. I'm 22 and male. I have bipolar and borderline personality disorder. I write my thoughts raw and my feelings. I don't focus on grammar, but just my emotions. If you are easily triggered, then I wouldn't read what I have written, but if not, and you think you can relate- to both benefit myself and you, I encourage you to check out my blog. I need to know I'm not alone, and I hope that you can be one of the people to show me that.
4 stitches | Heal me

lonely [8. 6. 2010, 5:56pm]
samrevealed
[ mood | depressed ]

I am a depressed person. I don't have a family that would care for me. I don't have friends who would listen to me when I am sad. I am all alone in this world. I am lost. I don't know what to do. I just want to end my life. It's weird how the only thing I fear about killing myself is that I might just survive. Someone please guide me. I don't know what to do. I don't know what to look forward for. It's like there's nothing in my life that could make me happy.

Heal me

Please Help Researchers Understand Self-harm [7. 27. 2010, 2:37pm]
perl_sfu
Hello again from the Personality and Emotion Research Laboratory (PERL)!

Would you like to help us understand how to help people who self-harm? We are currently recruiting participants for the second phase of our research on self-harm, and we want your help! Participating in the study takes only 90 minutes, and you will be entered into a draw to win one of five prizes of $150 CAD. If you are interested, please email us at chapman_lab@sfu.ca. All your information will be kept confidential, and no identifying information is linked to your responses.

**************************************************************
THE DETAILS:

Background Information: Self-injury (sometimes called “self-harm”) involves harming yourself on purpose. Some examples include cutting or burning yourself, taking an overdose of pills, or banging your head. Right now, very little is known about why people start or stop self-harming. The Personality and Emotion Research Lab (PERL), a research team from Simon Fraser University in Canada, is conducting a study to learn more about the experiences of people who self-harm, and we want your help! We are interested in how emotions, life experiences, stress and coping styles affect self-harm. We hope that this research will help other people understand more about why people self-harm and what they can do to help.

What you can do: If you want to participate in this study, you will fill out online questionnaires on self-harm, emotions, coping, symptoms, and life events. These questionnaires will take approximately 90 minutes to complete.

Who can participate: We are looking for people who currently self-harm (whether you are trying to stop or not), AND those who have self-harmed in the past and quit.

What’s in it for you: Participants who complete the questionnaires will be entered in a draw to win one of five prizes of $150 CAD. Telling us about your experiences will give us important information on how self-harm changes over time, and could help develop and improve treatments for people who want to stop self-harming.

Important Information: This study is the second phase of this line of research, and builds on the previous study. If you have already participated in our research (in a study called “Characteristics Associated with Self-Injury”), you are still eligible to complete this study.


Please contact us at chapman_lab@sfu.ca if you are interested in participating or if you have any questions.

Thank you,

Personality and Emotion Research Laboratory (PERL)
Simon Fraser University
Department of Psychology
RCB5246, 8888 University Drive
Burnaby, BC, Canada V5A 1S6
Heal me

Volunteers Needed for a Research Study on Self Injury [7. 25. 2010, 11:53am]

odu_researcher
Dear LJ Community,
 
The recruitment for our self injury study is now complete.
 
Thank you for your support of our research. Please feel free to email me with any questions you may have.
 
Sincerely,
 
~Tatyana Kholodkov
Graduate Student
Old Dominion University 
Heal me

Please Help Researchers Understand Self-harm [4. 14. 2010, 10:33am]
perl_sfu

 

 
Hello from the Personality and Emotion Research Laboratory (PERL)!

We're entering our last couple weeks of recruitment for our current study on self-harm.  A big thank you to those of you who have already participated in this research, your input and willingness to share your experiences with us is incredibly valuable!  To those who still want to participate, just send us an email at chapman_lab@sfu.ca.  You can find a bit more information about the study below.

Thanks again, and best wishes!

The Personality and Emotion Research Lab

*****************************************************************************************************

 

Would you like to help us understand how to help people who self-harm?

 

Self-injury (sometimes called “self-harm”) involves harming yourself on purpose. Some examples include cutting or burning yourself, taking an overdose of pills, or banging your head. Right now, very little is known about why people start or stop self-harming. The Personality and Emotion Research Lab (PERL), a research team from Simon Fraser University in Canada, is conducting a study to learn more about the experiences of people who self-harm, and we want your help!  We are interested in how emotions, life experiences, stress and coping styles affect self-harm. We hope that this research will help other people understand more about why people self-harm and what they can do to help. 

 

What you can do: If you want to participate in this study, you will fill out online questionnaires on self-harm, emotions, coping, symptoms, and life events. These questionnaires will take approximately 2 hours to complete.  

 

Who can participate: We are looking for people who currently self-harm (whether you are trying to stop or not) AND those who have self-harmed in the past and quit.

 

What’s in it for you: Participants who complete the questionnaires will be paid $5 CAD (money transfers via PayPal). You can also choose to participate in our long-term study, where you will fill out a shorter version of the questionnaires every three months for two years. You will be paid $5 CAD each time you complete a set of questionnaires (about 30 min each), and you will get a $15 CAD bonus once you have completed all 9 sets for a total of $60 CAD. Telling us about your experiences will give us important information on how self-harm changes over time, and could help develop and improve treatments for people who want to stop self-harming.

 

Please contact us at perl@sfu.ca if you are interested in participating or if you have any questions.

 

Thank you,

 

Personality and Emotion Research Laboratory (PERL)

Simon Fraser University

Department of Psychology
RCB5246, 8888 University Drive
Burnaby, BC, Canada V5A 1S6


Heal me

Help Researchers Understand Self-harm [3. 31. 2010, 2:20pm]
perl_sfu
Hello again from the Personality and Emotion Research Laboratory (PERL)!

Would you like to help us understand how to help people who self-harm? We are currently recruiting participants for the second phase of our research on self-harm, and we want your help! Participating in the study takes only 90 minutes, and you will be entered into a draw to win one of five prizes of $150 CAD. If you are interested, please email us at chapman_lab@sfu.ca. All your information will be kept confidential, and no identifying information is linked to your responses.

**************************************************************
THE DETAILS:

Background Information: Self-injury (sometimes called “self-harm”) involves harming yourself on purpose. Some examples include cutting or burning yourself, taking an overdose of pills, or banging your head. Right now, very little is known about why people start or stop self-harming. The Personality and Emotion Research Lab (PERL), a research team from Simon Fraser University in Canada, is conducting a study to learn more about the experiences of people who self-harm, and we want your help! We are interested in how emotions, life experiences, stress and coping styles affect self-harm. We hope that this research will help other people understand more about why people self-harm and what they can do to help.

What you can do: If you want to participate in this study, you will fill out online questionnaires on self-harm, emotions, coping, symptoms, and life events. These questionnaires will take approximately 90 minutes to complete.

Who can participate: We are looking for people who currently self-harm (whether you are trying to stop or not), AND those who have self-harmed in the past and quit.

What’s in it for you: Participants who complete the questionnaires will be entered in a draw to win one of five prizes of $150 CAD. Telling us about your experiences will give us important information on how self-harm changes over time, and could help develop and improve treatments for people who want to stop self-harming.

Important Information: This study is the second phase of this line of research, and builds on the previous study. If you have already participated in our research (in a study called “Characteristics Associated with Self-Injury”), you are still eligible to complete this study.


Please contact us at chapman_lab@sfu.ca if you are interested in participating or if you have any questions.

Thank you,

Personality and Emotion Research Laboratory (PERL)
Simon Fraser University
Department of Psychology
RCB5246, 8888 University Drive
Burnaby, BC, Canada V5A 1S6

Heal me

Help Researchers Understand Self-harm [12. 23. 2009, 10:09pm]
perl_sfu
Hello again from the Personality and Emotion Research Laboratory (PERL)!

Would you like to help us understand how to help people who self-harm?

We are currently recruiting participants for the second phase of our research on self-harm, and we want your help! Participating in the study takes only 90 minutes, and you will be entered into a draw to win one of five prizes of $150 CAD. If you are interested, please email us at chapman_lab@sfu.ca. All your information will be kept confidential, and no identifying information is linked to your responses.

**************************************************************
THE DETAILS:

Background Information:
Self-injury (sometimes called “self-harm”) involves harming yourself on purpose. Some examples include cutting or burning yourself, taking an overdose of pills, or banging your head. Right now, very little is known about why people start or stop self-harming. The Personality and Emotion Research Lab (PERL), a research team from Simon Fraser University in Canada, is conducting a study to learn more about the experiences of people who self-harm, and we want your help! We are interested in how emotions, life experiences, stress and coping styles affect self-harm. We hope that this research will help other people understand more about why people self-harm and what they can do to help.

What you can do:
If you want to participate in this study, you will fill out online questionnaires on self-harm, emotions, coping, symptoms, and life events. These questionnaires will take approximately 90 minutes to complete.

Who can participate:
We are looking for people who currently self-harm (whether you are trying to stop or not), AND those who have self-harmed in the past and quit.

What’s in it for you:
Participants who complete the questionnaires will be entered in a draw to win one of five prizes of $150 CAD. Telling us about your experiences will give us important information on how self-harm changes over time, and could help develop and improve treatments for people who want to stop self-harming.

Important Information: This study is the second phase of this line of research, and builds on the previous study. If you have already participated in our research (in a study called “Characteristics Associated with Self-Injury”), you are still eligible to complete this study.


Please contact us at chapman_lab@sfu.ca if you are interested in participating or if you have any questions.

Thank you,

Personality and Emotion Research Laboratory (PERL)
Simon Fraser University
Department of Psychology
RCB5246, 8888 University Drive
Burnaby, BC, Canada V5A 1S6

Heal me

[11. 26. 2009, 9:28pm]

sweetparamour
www.givesmehope.com
Cause sometimes we need to be reminded there is still good in this world


Heal me

[11. 26. 2009, 6:17am]

flamegirl_kitty
Collapse )

Angela Hartlin's memoir, FOREVER MARKED: A Dermatillomania Diary has finally been released! Please join her Facebook Fan page to spread word about this skin picking disorder along with her experiences with it.

People with this disorder have traits of Body Dysmorphic Disorder and usually suffer from depression. It is an Impulse Control Disorder that is fueled by high levels of anxiety. The first few pages can be previewed at the Lulu.com site, which includes a better definition of Dermatillomania.

Even if you do not have Facebook, the prices are listed there for Canadian, American, and International buyers. If you do, please spread the word of the fan page to everyone on your friend's list, even if you have to tell them that you're spreading the word for a friend! We need to raise awareness about this silent disorder and help break the stigma on mental health in general. You never know who is suffering in isolation from having this condition.

Please e-mail forever.markedATyahoo.ca if you want to purchase from Angela directly; she offers a lower shipping price than Lulu.com does. Include the country that you live in and she can send you a quote. She ships the day she gets a payment (or the day after), then sends an e-mail to confirm that it was sent.

Thank you. <3


Photobucket

Cross-posted all over... [8. 23. 2009, 12:19am]

morbidanibal
I could really use someone to talk to right now. If anyone's up for some chat, my SNs are in my profile. Thanks.

-A.~Ni
Heal me

Support site [5. 4. 2009, 4:20pm]
potterfreak1
Hey i am a recovering cutter and i made a support site that i think will help you..  Please take a look at the site.  http://selfhelp.yuku.com
Heal me

[4. 1. 2009, 3:54pm]

silvermoonchild
i need a connection in for pierce,fl!

772-940-9367
Heal me

Would you like to help us understand how to help people who self-harm? [3. 29. 2009, 1:37pm]
perl_sfu

Hello from the Personality and Emotion Research Laboratory (PERL)!

 

Would you like to help us understand how to help people who self-harm?

 

Self-injury (sometimes called “self-harm”) involves harming yourself on purpose. Some examples include cutting or burning yourself, taking an overdose of pills, or banging your head. Right now, very little is known about why people start or stop self-harming. The Personality and Emotion Research Lab (PERL), a research team from Simon Fraser University in Canada, is conducting a study to learn more about the experiences of people who self-harm, and we want your help!  We are interested in how emotions, life experiences, stress and coping styles affect self-harm. We hope that this research will help other people understand more about why people self-harm and what they can do to help. 

 

What you can do: If you want to participate in this study, you will fill out online questionnaires on self-harm, emotions, coping, symptoms, and life events. These questionnaires will take approximately 2 hours to complete.  

 

Who can participate: We are looking for people who currently self-harm (whether you are trying to stop or not) AND those who have self-harmed in the past and quit.

 

What’s in it for you: Participants who complete the questionnaires will be paid $5 CAD (money transfers via PayPal). You can also choose to participate in our long-term study, where you will fill out a shorter version of the questionnaires every three months for two years. You will be paid $5 CAD each time you complete a set of questionnaires (about 30 min each), and you will get a $15 CAD bonus once you have completed all 9 sets for a total of $60 CAD. Telling us about your experiences will give us important information on how self-harm changes over time, and could help develop and improve treatments for people who want to stop self-harming.

 

Please contact us at perl@sfu.ca if you are interested in participating or if you have any questions.

 

Thank you,

 

Personality and Emotion Research Laboratory (PERL)

Simon Fraser University

Department of Psychology
RCB5246, 8888 University Drive
Burnaby, BC, Canada V5A 1S6

 

 

Heal me

Weight is lifting away slowly [2. 19. 2009, 6:02pm]
danializabeth
So this is my first time being open about this to anyone, i am 27 years old and i have been cutting myself for about 10 years now. I havent been cutting myself  much as i used but still do. I hate doing this to myself, i have so many scars all over myself. I cant even ware short sleeve shirts because people ask me about the scars and than i just have to lie about how they got there.
 My Fiance gets mad at me because he knows im doing it but i have never come out and said i am, i deny it.
 I also tried to kill myself by taking an assortment of pills a few year ago, i just got very fucked up and it lasted 3 days. Nobody knows i did that. When i look over my life as far back as i can remember, i have always been depressed. It seems like every few years something shitty happens and i feel this way all over again and again or i just get down remembering the past.
 I do feel happy most of the time now but im still scared i'll get back to the way i used to be, some of the time i just feel anger.
I have a good life now but really my Fiance is a bit controlling and has been very violent in the past. He has changed and has not been violent for about 2 years now, I would say our relationship is really good now, were best friends yet still i have theese secrets!
 The first time i had sex i was raped, sex didnt mean love to me untill i met my fiance, i used to sleep around alot because i didnt care about myself and thought sex was all guys wanted from me.  When ever i would have sex i was high or drunk or both because i kept replaying that awful night in my head and i felt disgusting and dirty, i had to be high to have sex. Really the only man that has ever respected me is my Fiance, we didnt sleep together for almost 2 months into our relationship and that was his idea, he wanted it to be special.
I love him very much and he has helped me through alot of thing as i have for him over the past 10 years and that is why i want to come out with all this to him...no more secrets!
   Do you think i should tell him about theese things or no? What should i do?
1 stitches | Heal me

it has been a very long time [1. 12. 2009, 9:01pm]

snakewoman
[ mood | bored ]

well it has been a very long time since i wrote in this journal but the past few days i have been back to punching walls again it seems like the littlest thing have been making me just blow up i am really not for sure what is going on if it has to do with school or work (or i should say lack of work) but all i know is that i have been back to hitting walls a lot more then i have been and i really need to find different ways of dealing with my anger i know i have been told to hit a pillow or go for a walk but it is not that easy it may help for a few but then a little while later i just blow up again so if there is anyone who could help i would be grateful thanks

Heal me

Late night drear... [11. 16. 2008, 3:43am]

morbidanibal
[ mood | blah ]

Is anyone on and wanna talk? I just feel shitty and alone and yeah. Anyone? My contact info is in my profile. Thanks.

-Ani

Heal me

Please... [7. 12. 2008, 11:09pm]

morbidanibal
Go on over to my writing journal and scope it out? I want it to have more people reading it to not only get my works out but to be able to have people bring me criticism and questions and comments and suggesttions. Thanks.

sweet_sweetgaze

-A~Ni

Sorry: crossposted lots of places.
Heal me

Invitation to take part in an online research questionnaire [2. 19. 2008, 1:00am]

nicki123
Invitation to take part in an online research questionnaire
Collapse )
Heal me

Cutting without remembering? [1. 25. 2008, 9:02pm]

wth_am_i_doing
Greetings everyone,

I had been cutting five years (I'm 22 now), and just recently over the past six months I stopped due to intensive therapy and medication for my depression and issues.

I have also somewhat started to feel better about life and myself again, and I was rather proud of myself for not reverting back into self-harm.

However, just this past month or two, I have been noticing that I have a lot of new cuts and scars.

This completely bothers me, because I don't remember cutting myself at all. As hard as I think, I can't remember it. This is also somewhat scary because then I wonder, "What else am I doing that I don't remember?"

Is this common? Has any one ever experienced this before? I don't know what I should do...I really don't want to tell my doctor/therapist about it, because I fear they might make me stay in a hospital again...and I really want to pick up my life once more. I was all excited in thinking that I get to go back to school now and everything...but I'm scared that this may just make everything worse if I bring this issue up with those in authority over me.

What should I do?
Heal me

newbie [1. 26. 2008, 1:25am]

6persephone9
[ mood | calm ]

Hi.
I'm 20, 21 in under a month. I have been "cutting" since I was 13 or so... thought i would join and talk.
don't be shy, come and say hi...

Amber

1 stitches | Heal me

want to talk? [11. 27. 2007, 3:52pm]

livelovelife247
want to talk
19, college freshmen
cut for 5 years
AIM: lovinyouall247
*i would like to get to know soem of you*
take care
Heal me

[11. 19. 2007, 1:34pm]

hang_in_there
I love you. But sometimes, I hate you, i'm scared of you, I want to hurt you, I want to kill you. I want to hurt myself, I want to kill myself. Why won't you see or acknowledge whats going on, what you're doing to me??? I can't take this much longer. One day you WILL find me dead, and it will be YOUR name written on the walls in MY BLOOD. Then, only then you'll see what you've done to me, how you've broken me.
You make me want to die.
Heal me

[11. 14. 2007, 4:15pm]

hang_in_there
[ mood | contemplative ]

I know its not healthy, but I don't care, but I do. I want it to consume my life, but I don't.
Part of me wants to be this skinny, beautiful, delicate little twig; fragile and sickly and weak; someone needed to be protected. my idea of beauty. I want to control and purge and restrict, be light and airy.
But part of me knows its stupid; I AM SKINNY; I'm 5'4'', 120 lbs. I enjoy having energy. I enjoy wrestling my 230lbs. boyfriend and winning. I don't want some stupid thing like that to consume me; i've got far more important things.
So I'm just trying to find a happy medium. Thats all.
I have a bad tendency to starve when I'm depressed, eat when I'm happy. Neither one is good; when I'm happy, I feel so good I could eat a bucket of ice cream. But when I'm depressed I starve; I make myself suffer so everyone sees my pain. So I guess in that aspect I have a depression triggered eating disorder? I dunno.
Sometimes I feel like a failure, a loser who won't do it because she can't handle it. That if she really wanted it, she'd stop being such a pig. But then I have to say to myself; "dude, you're 120 lbs."
Sometimes thats good enough for me; sometimes its not.

1 stitches | Heal me

New/relapse/vent [11. 8. 2007, 7:47pm]

ittybittyme
[ mood | drained ]

Hi everybody,

I am 20 years old and have been si free for about 4 years now. I started si'ing when I was 13 and got help when I was 16. I have been successful with my recovery (besides like, one slip-up a year). I am a junior in college and studying to be a nurse. This semster has just been really very stressful for me. I always have a ton of work to do, feel imcompetent at clincal and one of my clinicals/classes is psych which I am having a hard time handling. Anyways, I cracked on sunday and cut a few times. I just don't really know what to do. I am not sure if I should go to CAPS (counesling and psychological services) or just wait and see if my urges to si subside. Its hard to tell because sometimes I just feel terrible and cry and other times I feel fine. I just cant wait for this semester to be over. I am glad that there is a community like this where one can vent. I cant do it in my own journal as my friends dont really believe in depression/si.

2 stitches | Heal me

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